First blog post

As my  very first blog,I shall explain the pain I get to see in the society of now with my drugs beside me .. 

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Rip brother

Dear brother

You were more than that to me

The memories we expressed was more than I could say

When I heard you were gone!!

I regretted not being there for you

Friends for 14 years got me to tears

Nostalgia hit me and the badinage moments we shared

I was provoked by my own words

I was in a berzek state of mind

Penetrated from each angle

Your mom has always been proud of you

Hi tone;-

But the questions that kept running through my head

Left in me in sorrow and misery

Emotionless people do exist

Attenuate to reposnd to their mistakes

They left you dying on the spot

Begging for that life

You were never a candid person but I understood you

I can’t imagine it all came to an end

Before I reached out

It hurts so much you died young

Before reacreating this world

I do hope we meet in another lifetime

To fulfill and make the beauty out of it

I hope your murder will come to be understood.

DEAR TWIN

Twice the love

Half the sleep 🛌

Born together

Best friends for life

Begun the start of our journey

Most times I was locked from speech

While you were open to it

But the uniqueness and powers within us

Begun as one but I left the frenetic part for you

You have never been the best listener 👂

But definitely the adviser in my situations

Never as Pugnacious

But mentally, emotionally and physically

Your world was undescribable 🌏

Sometimes we would connect

Other times I was lost 🏳

Whenever we tried being

Mendacious it never worked

We had this quirk in each other

We connected in everything

But at least writing was our home

A twins connection is so strong than that basic friendship. Am proud to have one other half of me 💯🌊

REASON vs EMOTION

Please just listen carefully

Your beautiful and handsome

But I got no time to deliver the message to you

I try recreate a better me

Yes am selfish… but it Is survival

The world is harsh

And am no longer to entertain

Peoples desires above mine

This is not about me and you

Just yourself and its depression

My anxiety is mine

My mental health is mine

So let’s find a way to keep distant

You are no longer my problem

You no longer the happiness

The late night smiles

I am all that without you

Yes I know and I know you will say:

I will never be happy

But you are not my neurotransmitter

Your also not the happiness

I present how it will be

So please respect me

SENTIMENT

Emotions are like cities

Either contained or broken

Ensnared through the world 🌏

Melancholy through every breathe

Overwhelmed with the affairs

Torpor in my progressions

Insular but open to my perceptive

Onerous and not prepared

Nostalgia through my past

Sabotage in my surroundings

I was feeling so much

That my expressions were locked

Some days were sunshine

Others were cloudy and cold ⛅

I lived in each different motion

Time never stopped the emotion

It was a prison you couldn’t escape

But more like the only place

You would express than contain

Consumed by drugs to deject pain

But all you did was to be highly elevated

For hours and back to the same state

Secret was

The begining had and ending

Ignored

How does it feel to be ignored..!!

Someone you care about

And last to do that

Life is a journey

And all you need is less

Your emotions are yours not the other persons

Grow to know, not everyone will be there

But the less that are there

Appreciate and make them happy

Those who waste your time

Close their chapter

But create a new story

Live Convivial with an open mind

Not weak in heart

But open to change and creation.

LOVE FADES

The first expression towards this

Lands us to no real definition

We are configured to finding

The mistery each day;

Loquacious in mind

obstancy but caught through emotions

V triad not part of my vocabulary

Evince through my perceptive

The words are scribble

The emotions are bought

The actions abused

Left in no touch

But through contradiction

The new word

The new person in town

But deception as its partner

Each am sad to express love beacause its abused let’s compare the 90s to know the 21 century where even married people divorce in weeks or months. Relationships to lost do not media just communication. Remember you do not need emotions but commitment. Let’s respect the value of having another person. It is sad that love is no longer a thought but an abuse

FRIENDSHIP CONTINUATION

What is friendship..!!?

Words are missed between the action in it

Am not special or different just unique

I value my time and yours

But being approached to talk about someone

Might not be in vocubluarly

That’s when friendship fades and dies

I wouldn’t say am quirk

But the energy you produce says alot

It can be to formal or not

I prefer to Subservience through my passion

Let’s get together into this ;

Felicitous through the arguments

Refiy through our struggles

Ineluctable through our sorrows

Expiate with love

Natured into our space

Deleterious not within us

Stalwart and real to each other

Holistic through our perception

Impervious through the heat

Prescience to each others benefit

We leave in a deception world, let’s be real for a minute. Does it mean that everyone in your life or circle are always going to be there for your back. No matter how much you say they are your friends. There is only one time you will see the reality, when your falling down or apart you will see the ones to bring you up. Life is funny we don’t choose the reality in it, shit happens. love life first before anything else.

WORDS

Optimist through my perceptive

But pessimist through everything I touch

Realistic as the words to my vision

physicist through my chemicals

Dopamine, oxycotin and serototion

surrealist as my reify towards my personality

Relativist but protean to my connections

Disjointed and dissapproved to my flow

Hidden but abused by its touch

Ethral through my confidence

utopist but drab to my vision

scepticist but shown through diffidence

Artistic but captures in the moments

Words disconnect me from reality

I was raised in a family of people who read alot, but I was not ventured in books just a dictionary. What I express is how words can have a far way deep meaning that how we look at them. To understand this you will have to patient

RAPE

Your weight impeled against me

I was gasped and out of recognition

Bomabared with emotions

I was lost in that moment

You tore my inner wear

And forcefully pushed yourself

Furiously you tore me apart

My cry

My scream

Got to knows attention

His silence was prevailed

Left me punctured with no dignity

Got Me through alot of thoughts

Suicide was my meal

I valued the end of my existence

More than my growth to life

The memories never earsed

The nights never become calm

Each days progress hurt more

Than I could express

My relations towards men

Never become easier

My emotions were lost

My perception was ventured and abused

My friend told me her story, it affected me because of how some men are animals and wild. This rapists are consider switched off to emotions and through some process they are connected to their reality to feel what they did, but it still never gives me any justification or reason to do waht they do. Better to buy a prostitute than abuse someone for your benfits.